Truth, Toys, and Turn-Ons: A Joyful Guide to Intimacy After 35
We’re thrilled to welcome Kiana Reeves, Chief Intimacy Officer at Foria and a certified Somatic Sex Educator, as our guest blog author. With both professional expertise and lived experience, Kiana brings a grounded, compassionate voice to conversations around pelvic health, pleasure, and womanhood through life’s transitions. Her work helps shift sexual wellness from taboo to empowerment—making her the perfect guide for women embracing intimacy and self-care after 35.
Why should women think of lubes, oils, and other intimacy tools as essentials (not extras) for sexual wellness?
There is a modern myth around sexual support with products like lube, vibrators, and other tools that we all need to debunk! It is that if you’re sexually healthy you don’t need support with pleasure, or lubrication, or stimulation. This pervasive myth comes out especially in partnership, where we’re afraid of hurting our partner's feelings if we want to use lube, a vibrator, or another product to make us feel even better in our sexual connections.
This internalized belief can impact the quality of our sex life and what we feel safe communicating about and asking for. Even if your body produces a lot of lubrication, it’s still going to add more pleasure and comfort to use lube—for both partners. Lube is a great way to start any kind of genital stimulation, keep things comfy, and protect sensitive skin. Same goes for tools like vibrators and oils. Anything that brings you more pleasure is a way to deepen and support a great sexual experience. They are not a threat—they’re a gateway to exploration, communication, and joy.
How can products help address the shifts that happen because of childbirth, aging, perimenopause, or menopause?
The female body is an ever-changing system. Through menstruation, motherhood, perimenopause, and menopause, we move through dynamic transitions. These cycles impact our physical bodies, relationships, and emotional well-being. While products are just one part of the support ecosystem, they can play a meaningful role—especially when addressing dryness, irritation, hormonal shifts, and changes in libido or sensation.
Having the right tools on hand helps us stay connected to pleasure and supports a healthy relationship with our body at every stage of life.
What are the biggest myths or misconceptions you’d like to bust about using lubricants or sexual wellness tools?
One of the most common myths is that “you only need lube if you’re dry.” This idea can make women who don’t naturally lubricate feel broken, and others feel awkward asking for it. The truth? Vaginal lubrication varies from person to person and isn’t always a reliable indicator of arousal.
“Genital non-concordance” means you can feel turned on without showing the physical signs—like lubrication. Using lube is not about fixing something. It’s about enhancing pleasure and comfort for everyone involved.”
Couples who use lube report greater pleasure, increased comfort, and better communication in the bedroom. That’s something worth embracing!
What role does lube play in enhancing pleasure and comfort, even for women who don’t experience dryness?
Even if you're naturally lubricated, lube provides extra cushion and reduces friction. Our vaginal and vulvar tissues are delicate and need moisture to stay protected—especially during intimacy. More lube means more comfort and often, more pleasure. It's one of the simplest ways to elevate your experience.
How do ingredients matter when choosing lubricants and oils?
Always check the label. The vaginal tissue is highly absorbent, and ingredients matter. At Foria, we focus on clean, plant-based formulas like organic MCT coconut oil—long-lasting, gentle, and pH-compatible. Avoid ingredients like fragrance, glycerine, and sweeteners, which can disrupt the vaginal microbiome or lead to irritation.
What other types of products can help with pelvic health, discomfort, or loss of sensitivity?
Suppositories are a lesser-known but incredibly effective way to support vaginal health and pleasure. Foria’s Intimacy Melts, Booty Melts, and Vibrance Melts use natural ingredients to help enhance lubrication, comfort, and arousal—all while delivering targeted benefits directly to the tissues that need it most.
How can women open the conversation with a partner about using products in the bedroom without feeling awkward?
Awkwardness is often a sign of growth. Many of us were never taught how to talk about our needs, especially sexual ones. A simple framework: start with appreciation, then express your need. For example:
“I love the way you kiss me—it makes me feel desired. I’m needing a bit more warm-up time before penetration. Can we slow things down together?”
This turns a request into an invitation, not a critique—and opens the door to better communication and deeper connection.
Why is it important to normalize sexual wellness as part of overall health and self-care?
Sexual health is deeply tied to our sense of well-being and fulfillment. A satisfying sex life often reflects how well we’re caring for ourselves physically and emotionally. When we support our sexual needs—whether through education, open communication, or nourishing products—we support our confidence, relationships, and overall happiness.
